Please paste all submissions. No attachments.

Submissions must not exceed 1000 words unless those extra words are fucking genius. Even so, you'd be wise to keep it under 1000, with priority given to fiction that tells the most engaging and self-contained story in the fewest words (average length of accepted pieces is around 300-600).

Include a clever two-sentence bio in the space provided. You can list all the publications in which your previous work has been featured if that gets you off, but we prefer insight into who you are or imagine yourself to be.